Solitude and Silence

"Silence is frightening because it strips us as nothing else does, throwing us upon the stark realities of our life."  -Dallas Willard, "The Spirit of the Disciplines"

"It is a good discipline to wonder in each new situation if people wouldn't be better served by our silence than by our words."  -Henri J. M. Nouwen, "The Way of the Heart"

Ther"We receive only when we are recollected; only in silence is heard the beating of the heart of God." -Father Bernardo Olivera

"Best of any song is bird song in the quiet, but first you must have the quiet." -Wendell Berry

There are many attitudes, actions, and assumptions, which are a part of our normal routines that are serious hindrances to God's work of changing our hearts. Our first step to opening up our lives to God's grace is to expose these hindrances. When we can identify the blockage, we can then take the appropriate steps to remove it.

We will examine some causes of spiritual suffocation: noise and loneliness. We will then explore the practices we can use to overcome them, thus opening our lives up to the life-change that God has made available through Jesus Christ.

Noise and Company: Trying to Fill the Infinite with the Finite

Every one of us has an infinite void in our hearts that we attempt to fill with noise, people, busy-ness, possessions, and other finite things. This is a major sickness in our culture.

We are addicted to noise. We need noise. We've got to have noise! Silence is creepy, even frightening. Silence steals away the distractions of life which anesthetize us from the feeling that our lives are still empty. Noise helps us live on the banks of denial. Noise keeps us concentrated on something else-anything else!

We are addicted to company. Notice also the many ways we work to fill the space around us. We fear being alone. We fear solitude. However, our attempts to fill our lives with company will never satisfy the true hunger of the heart-community with God.

I do not suggest that we do not need relationships with other people. On the contrary, we need more true relationships with other people. However, time is necessary if one is to develop a true friendship with God.

Solitude and Silence: Filling the Infinite Void with the Infinite Fullness of God.

• Solitude is the practice of being absent from other people and other things so that you can be present with God. In solitude, we rest from our attempts to re-create the world in our image. We rest from arranging our relationships and manipulating people with our words. In solitude, we say to God, "I am here to be changed into whatever you like." In solitude, we learn to "wait on the Lord."
• Silence is the practice of quieting every voice, including your own inner and outer voices. It is written of one of the Desert Fathers, Abbot Agatho, "that for three years he carried a stone in his mouth until he learned to be silent." Silence means being still so that we can hear the Voice that searches our hearts and minds.
• Silence also means excusing ourselves from the voices of others. The demands of the world around us do not easily go away. We hear countless requests and demands each day from the people around us. Each vying for our time and attention. Certainly some of these voices are important for us to hear-especially the voices of our family. However, there is One Voice that is above all necessary for us to hear. For this reason, we must develop habits of being unavailable to the voices all around us so we can learn to hear the Divine Voice.
• Silence is also necessary to free ourselves from our tendency to control. Silence frees us from the tyranny we hold over others with our words. Words are the weapons we lay down when we practice silence. We give up our insistence of being heard and obeyed.
• Solitude and silence, combined with an engaged mind. These are the practices to open our lives up to the grace of God. God says, "Be still, and know that I am God" (Psalm 46:10).
• Solitude and silence, combined with a mind that is actively waiting on God will enable us to view life as God reveals it to us. In silence and solitude, we discover that our infinitely empty lives can only find fulfilment in an infinite God.

Brother Lawrence wrote, “When our emptiness has been replaced by the fullness of His presence, we begin to view all other parts of life in a new way. God removes the "continual lust for more" (Eph 4:19) that results from a life apart from Him, and replaces it with contentment and ridiculous generosity.”

Silence and solitude combined with attention to the presence of God is the starting point for all other practices. They place us where we may listen to hear God's perspective on our world, our circumstances, our goals, and our relationships.

Well, how do you do it? How does a person go about putting these practices into practice?

1. Solitude and silence may require time and space.
2. Take advantage of the “little solitudes” that fill our day. Consider memorized Scripture. Chew it over in your thoughts and apply it in appropriate ways to your circumstances and relationships.
3. Consider an attribute of God. Think of the significance of the fact that He is present (also, able to do the impossible, gracious, good, just, etc.)
4. Listen. Wait in active stillness, "more than watchmen wait for the morning, more than watchmen wait for the morning" (Ps 130:5-6).
5. Attempt to gain control over your words and make them few and full.
6. Try to see how quiet you can actually make your home, car, etc.
7. Create a regular, non-negotiable place in your schedule that is solely for the purpose of being alone and still before God.
8. If you have large blocks of time where you are alone (at home, in the car), leave the television, radio, cell phone etc., off and focus your thoughts on scripture and in prayer.
9. Two or three times a year withdraw for three to four hours for the purpose of reorienting your life goals. What do you want to have accomplished one year from now? Ten years from now? Keep a journal of what comes to mind during these times. Ask God to show you new alternatives for the future.
10. Walk. I take long walks through the woods. Try not to think about much–just decompress from life.
11. Read the Bible, a whole book at a time. Read books that can help you reorient your life goals.
12. Solitude and silence do not always require time and space. When you develop a habit of solitude and silence, you will be able to take them with you wherever you go-especially in the hectic places of your life.

Why practice SILENCE AND SOLITUDE?

Follow Jesus’ Example. forty days alone in the desert (MT 4:1- 11). An entire night alone in the desert hills (Luke 6:12) “withdrew from there in a boat to a lonely place apart” (Matthew 14:13) “went up into the hills by himself…” (MT 14:23) spent time alone (Mark 1:35; Mark 6:31; Luke 4:42; Luke 5:16; Matthew 17:1-9; Matthew 26:36-46).

• To Hear the Voice of God Better.
• To Express Worship To God. Habakkuk 2:20.
• To Express Faith in God. Psalm 62:1,2
• To Seek the Salvation of the Lord. Lamentations 3:25-28
• To be physically and spiritually restored. Mark 6:31.
• To regain spiritual perspective.
• To seek the will of God. (1 Kings 19:12)
• To learn control of the tongue. James 1:19

FRUIT OF SILENCE AND SOLITUDE

• Being attentive to the voice of Jesus.
• Having freedom from negative habits of speech (deception, gossip, impulsive chatter, small talk, impression management, the need to express your opinion or critique.)
• Freedom from addictions to noise or sound (radio, TV, phone, iPod, etc.); the need to be occupied and stimulated.
• Having deeper intimacy with God.
• Growing in self-awareness as the silence invites the subconscious to move into deeper levels of knowing.
• Developing increased listening skills.
• Moving away from letting the world squeeze you into its mould (Romans 12:2).